This summer we moved our family to the beautiful historic town of Leesburg, Virginia, located thirty miles northwest of our nation's capital. Jonathan and I are renting a townhome close to Bobby and Rachel's award winning new schools. My cousin and sister's best friend from high school live only a few minutes away. All the shopping pleasures one could ever imagine are within walking distance, and I have only a five minute commute to my new position at a local Hilton hotel. The ice cream truck, playing Christmas music year round, visits our neighborhood regularly! We are loving this diverse community and our new church home as well.
One of the most pleasant surprises for me is how much I am enjoying townhouse living. There is a limited amount of maintenance required on this property. What a nice change for us! Substantially downsizing due to both financial necessity and also the desire to simplify, I also really like having such a small yard to care for. It never gets out of control or unmanageable like my acreage in Southwest Virginia did. We can spend our free time doing activities as a family rather than working on the property. And even though my yard is small, thankfully my head still clears itself every time I kneel in front of the flowers and manicure my little garden slice.
It is during this yard time that my brain seems to reset and the creative juices start flowing. It has actually been several months since I've written anything. Moving is a busy task, that's for sure. So is focusing on acclimating my little angels to their new community. Everything is going great, and we thank God every day that He has brought us to this amazing place. Now that we are settling into our family's new routine, that all familiar writing nudge has returned! I am praying in the midst of the busyness, some time can be carved out to pen some of these ideas swirling around my head.
Jonathan and I have a thin landscaping area lining our driveway and were looking for something that would grow out to cover the area with color. So after moving in, we planted one of my favorite flowering plants: lantana. Known for its gorgeous flowers and resiliency, lantana requires very little maintenance. Just plant it and let it grow, I thought, because I have had decent success with this plant in every yard I've planted it in previously. Lantana is consistently a good looking and good acting plant, at least to the casual garden observer, which is what I am. We also placed lantana in this spot in hopes that the plants would grow and cover a crooked brick border along the driveway. So far, so good.
One afternoon recently as we arrived home, Jonathan looked over at the lantana and said, "I think we need to dead head those plants." Confused, I said "really? I've never done that to lantana before. I just leave them alone and they seem perfectly fine." Stepping out of the car, my husband sweetly motioned me to come over to him and take a more careful look. "Laura," he gently asked, "before we work on these plants, do you see the differences in the buds?" Bending down, I approached them with a casual glance. The differences appeared minor and were actually a bit challenging to spot at first. However, after analyzing the buds more closely, I recognized the new buds had just a hint of yellow forming around the edges. The dead ones were solid light green, with no hint of sunshine peeking through. Turning to Jonathan I said, "ah, now I see what you see. There, that is a dead head. And over here, that one is fresh and good." Smiling, he said, "yes, and we just need to do some dead heading so the plants can flower more beautifully and spread the way we want them to."
For the next hour or so, we trimmed the dead heads off of each plant. Some of the buds needing to be cut were on top and fairly easy to spot. It was, however, necessary to peel back the small branches on the plant in order to identify the dead buds hiding within each plant. Many of these dead heads were deep inside the plants and easily masked by the new growth around them. I had no idea from looking at the outside of the plants that there was so much death underneath.As my hand brushed the side of the plant, moving the outer branches aside to expose the inside, I was reminded that in life we should go through the same process, continually peeling back the layers of our lives, examining our behavior and motives in our relationships with others. It is true that as Christians we have already been made spiritually whole through Christ's sacrifice. The perfect, sinless God looks upon us and sees flawless beauty, not because of anything good we have done or could ever do. Rather, it is because of who He is and what He's done for us and through us. Growing in sanctification and maintaining that goodness as we relate to others is a different matter, however, because we are all imperfect humans prone to self preservation.
If we want to grow in our relationship with God, and likewise, if we truly want our marriage relationship or the relationships we have with our friends and family to successfully thrive, it is important to examine ourselves regularly. Peel back the layers of your heart and ask yourself some hard questions regarding your motives and you will often find there are more dead heads underneath than you may wish to admit. I am writing this not to shame you, but rather to encourage you. As bad motives or harmful decisions are nipped at the base of the bud one dead head at a time, exponential growth and beauty can happen in your life. It is an exercise I have to go through every single day in my relationships with Jonathan, my children, coworkers, or friends, as well as in my communications with difficult people or before I consider publishing anything on this site.After dead heading the lantanas, the plants are growing to their fullest potential. They have produced gorgeous flowers and are covering the crooked brick border along our driveway. So to, as we continuously peel back the own layers of our hearts, attempt to daily eliminate pride and selfish motives within our lives, beauty and authentic holiness can flourish within us. We can love those around us successfully and be happier people as a result.
