I AM Right in Front of You

After attending a birthday party Saturday night in Roanoke's Southwest County, we returned home via the Blue Ridge Parkway. Doing so allows us to avoid the stoplights, traffic, and less desirable parts of town that we otherwise would have to drive through to get to our home on the western edge of Bedford County. Riding on the parkway at night is similar to the daytime in that it isn't a heavily traveled road. That is nice because it is always a peaceful drive devoid of traffic. However, it is starkly different than during the day in that it is extremely dark. Unable to see the beautiful scenery the parkway offers in the daylight hours, I find it to be dangerous due to creatures entering the road whenever they please. Deer are famous for crowding the parkway at night, so it is essential that eyes constantly be kept on the road. There are no street lights and very few additional cars to light the way, and it is impossible to see anything clearly past the reach of the automobile's headlights.

If you look ahead a few hundred feet, you will notice the headlights illuminating various signs posted ahead, similar to this photo. The signs glow in the midst of the darkness surrounding them, but they are blurry, and they can't be clearly distinguished or read until they are properly lit. All that the driver and passengers can view along the road is what is precisely in front of the vehicle.

What we experience on a dark parkway at night is similar to how life can be, and how we should respond to the hazy, slightly-lit-far-ahead-signs in our future. Just as the car only lights what is right in front of us, in Psalm 119:105, God's Word is described as a "lamp for my feet, a light on my path." The Bible does not say that God provides a giant strobe light giving us answers for everything that is far, far ahead. Instead, He provides just enough light - - just enough truth - - to show us where our feet need to walk in that moment. He illuminates the path so our eyes can see only what is necessary for us to see right then.

It can be scary and frustrating - - not being able to see further down the road. Those signs are glowing in the midst of the darkness down there! Wouldn't it be nice if we could just read them all now so we'd know exactly what to expect? Well, if we focus too much on what may harm or help us down the road several hundred feet, we may miss the danger - - or even the beauty - - that is along the path God is lighting for us right here and right now. 

I believe that is one reason why God described Himself to Moses as "I AM." As Moses was preparing to rescue the Israelites from the hands of the Egyptians, he asked the Lord who he should say gave him the authority. "God said to Moses, I AM WHO I AM." This is what you are to say to the Israelites: 'I AM has sent me to you.'" Exodus 3:14. The people were living in such an inhumane environment, struggling every single day just to survive as slaves. They needed the assurance of God's current sustaining presence.

God could have easily told Moses to say, "tell them I am the God who will do amazing things in your future, rescue you from the hands of the Pharaoh, part the Red Sea, kill your enemies, and bring you to a land flowing with milk and honey." Those words may have offered limited comfort to the Israelites, but considering they were struggling to eat, drink, and stay alive due to the harsh conditions they suffered, they most likely would've rolled their eyes at him and said, "yeah right, I need water NOW."

Also, if God had told them about their future, He would've also had to include the difficult things they were about to endure. True, the Israelites did escape captivity. They did see Pharoah's army swallowed up by the Red Sea after their own families miraculously crossed through it. But before that happened, their workload increased in difficulty. After Moses showed up and demanded their release, Pharoah commanded that the slaves begin collecting their own straw to build the bricks. In essence he punished them the second Moses arrived, and it didn't stop there. Quotas for what was expected of them didn't lesson, even as their toil grew harder. Multiple plagues crossed the land they inhabited. If God were to shine a strobe light on all the details of our future, I am not really sure we would have the strength to keep going. There is enough trouble right where we are, in today. That is why He only lights our feet along the path.

Similarly, God could have said to Moses, "tell them I am the God who provided for your ancestors, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, and Joseph. Believe in me because of what I have done in the past for your people. That should give you faith." Looking to what God has done for you in the past is a helpful reminder, but it usually isn't enough to strengthen us during present troubles.

God didn't tell Moses He is the God that was or the God that will be. Instead, he told Moses to tell them, "I AM has sent me to you." Those people needed to feel God with them in the NOW. And so do we. Knowing that Christ is fully present in what we are dealing with NOW gives us the strength to keep driving down the dark road. So often we dwell on our past mistakes, or our fear of the future. Through this Scripture, and experiencing the road only lit right in front of me Saturday night along the parkway, I am inclined to believe that our duty is to recognize that God is the great "I AM," the One who wants us to walk down the path that He promises to light for us, one step at a time. Eventually those glowing signs in the distance will no longer be blurry, because He will bring His light and clarity to all of it.

Hungry Birds

Mr. and Mrs. Bird are two beautiful parakeets we have introduced into our home over this past year. Mr. Bird came to our family first in the spring and proved to be more antisocial than we hoped. I do believe he is a chicken - - not a parakeet! As his cage is approached, Mr. Bird darts around, working as hard as he can to hide somewhere - - anywhere -- so as to not be removed from the perceived safety of his home. 

He is also extremely particular regarding the food he eats. The small round millet seed has, from the start, been the only food he will touch. And of course that food is not what is best for him. It is like candy, providing little to no nourishment for his growing body. My husband has even taken the little green bird out of the cage, made a special pellet mash, and placed the nutritional food down Mr. Bird's throat - - only to have him spit it right back up like a little child.

Stubborn, stubborn bird.

Despite multiple attempts to increase his sociability and feed him properly, we finally decided this summer to introduce a female companion in hopes that the two of them would mate. Perhaps if there are little parakeet babies, we can train them to be hand-fed social creatures that completely trust us and receive the proper nutrition.

Introducing Mrs. Bird into the family shortly after our own wedding this summer was the right decision, because although the two of them haven't decided to procreate yet, they do greatly enjoy each other's company. They groom, speak to, and care for one another. It is really sweet. Mr. Bird has seemed happier, and has even started eating a second type of seed from his food because he has observed his wife eating it. That is progress at least.

Mr. Bird (left) and Mrs. Bird (right)

"Try the red ones honey! I promise they're yummy too!"

(She says to him as she supervises from above)

Since the two lovebirds haven't decided to do the deed quite yet (although they're getting closer thankfully,) we haven't given up on their social training. Some time ago, we decided that in order to increase the likelihood of having both birds trust us as their masters, we would cease putting the candy-like food inside their cage dishes. The nutritional pellets are there, and Mrs. Bird just today of all days as I'm writing began snacking on it!

To ensure the birds stay healthy and don't squawk at us continuously demanding to be fed, we open up the door, hold our hand out, and let them step up to us to get their food. It is good when a parakeet comes to his master - listens to him, freely steps up onto his hand, and trusts him. If the birds aren't very hungry, they do the dart around, hide and ignore us trick. Tonight though, both birds freely came to me because they were genuinely hungry. As their master, I was pleased. They trusted me, and they were blessed with full bellies. I even returned them to the safety of their cage home because I knew, as their parent, that's what they wanted. I love those sweet little birds.

You know what? I really am just like my parakeets! Especially Mr. Bird. I'm often scared and prone to darting around everywhere in my little world - - sincerely afraid to trust my Master. How silly of me since He is the One with the exact food I need. He opens up His perfectly capable and loving hand and feeds me just what I need. Admittedly, especially recently, I am not always returned to the safety of my cage home! But He is feeding me in the ways He knows I need to be fed. There is peace in the spiritual safety He is providing for me, even though the circumstances haven't exactly been ideal. No doubt about it, my Master has got it because He loves me. His intent is never to harm me, just like I would never intentionally harm these sweet beautiful little parakeets. Same goes for how He feels about you.

The song below is a beautiful reminder of how God is the one who feeds those of us who are spiritually hungry. Please consider closing your eyes to listen and worship.

After observing the behavior of our birds, I am convinced that God has put those two creatures in our home to show me exactly how weak and out of control I am and how incredibly strong and capable of feeding me God truly is.

Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the one who takes refuge in him. Psalm 34:8

Because You Loved Me

When you arrived, I knew. You smiled through your eyes, and I saw your soul. Sharing the depths of my experiences and feelings with you right away was a risk, because I didn't think it was possible to be loved unconditionally. There was so much hurt inside. Yet you proved me wrong, accepting me from the start. Somehow you are able to love me more each day!

You believed in me when I did not... gave me faith because you believed. Although my light was dim and faded, you still saw it there. Believing in my potential, somehow seeing my heart, you stayed... and loved me. Now I am ready to face whatever God has planned for us.

Through each challenge, you have held me. You are my strength... guiding me each step to do what is best in the battles we face. I am able to love more fully because of what you teach me, my beloved. You speak for me when I don't have the words. Kindness adorns your lips and guides your actions.

In describing you here, I am also describing Christ. You are the epitome of the love of Christ, displaying it daily in your relationship with me.

You are the only gift I need this Valentine's Day. Just you! xo